Friday, 17 October 2008

PottyMouthMama: Bin-Raider

Last night I set off at 8:30pm. I left it late so that all the neighbours would be tucked up in their little houses doing what all neighbours do. Eating dinner, watching re-runs of Wheel of Fortune and listening to their children crying on and off until they finally succumb to sleep. Oh that's just me that does that, well hmph!

I drove up again, just in case it was another large stash and I needed the boot space (amidst some prams, green bags and a smattering of sand toys) to hide the haul. I got out of my car. Firstly, here's my mistake. I didn't check to see who was around. When I hopped out, I was holding a torch. I was wearing a hoodie. There was a man, 60 or so putting his bins out, who stopped to watch me. Checking out what this hoodlum was doing. I was like some crazed deer stuck in the headlights. What could I do to meld with the 'hood? I looked at my mobile. Hindsight tells me this probably looked even dodgier. I then popped the boot - I was freaking out because he was standing there watching me (I hadn't even gotten close to my bin yet), touched a few things in the boot and popped my torch in there. I don't need to explain that right then, my brain stopped working. I then walked down the road, away from the bin, away from my car, and away from the staring man. What was I going to do? Who knows. I waited 'til he walked up his driveway then I returned to the car and drove off home. My heart was pounding a little too hard.

Matt was surprised I came home so quickly. So empty-handed. I recounted the story. I watched the end of my movie (watch it, but the book is brilliant, and you'll read it in half a day and never, ever forget it, I've read it a number of times, and it's amazing each read) and then went back out at 10:10pm.
I figured by this time the driveaway dude would be tucked up in bed watching his stocks plummet while his wife ironed his socks.

I decided to make a quick kill. Bin number 1 - paper recycling - full, but my friends, I just couldn't be bothered. If the treasures hadn't floated to the top, I just wasn't going to get into it. Call it tiredness, call it laziness, or call it lack of mojo, whatever - I seem to be losing my will to dive. Bin number 2 - glass/metal/plastic recycling - some cut amidst poison bottles. There was no way my un-gloved hands were going that-a-way.

And then there was the cherry. Another gleaming white skip in the driveaway. A big 'un. I stood in the street wondering if I should chance it. It's now that I realise I have forgotten to tell you one important point. There was a light on in the kitchen. A booby trap? Were they peering out from their windows just waiting for me? I figure that because it's just the kitchen light, that perhaps it was accidentally left on. I sidle down the driveaway a wee bit, comfortable that my mother-in-law (who recently received honours in law) has told me it's not trespassing until you get to the front door (I may have that wrong - so don't blame me if you get busted). Peer into the bin. It was dark outside. Oh so dark. But with a full moon rising, I could see the skip was completely empty.

I might tell you now that this was a relief. I know. You're probably shaking your head at me. Relief that there was nothing? Yes, it's true. How much excitement can one take? Not much more! The adventures of me and my bin are adrenaline pumping, but is my wee heart going to give out one day because I find... vintage tea towels, pillowcases, costume jewellery, oversized Jackie O style sunglasses still in their box and a yellow bedside table (these are on my wish list to find, ok??), who knows. I'm not sure how much longer I can keep this up.

To be honest, I am more than a little peeved with these people. How many people have had enjoyment from reading about my escapades, me with my torch riding into the sunset? Lotsa lotsa. My family ring me the next day to find out what I found. It's a given. But these people, emptying this house, a room at a time - well they could have given all this stuff to charity stores and as well as making some collectors very happy, they could have helped a charity along the way. But instead - they've tossed everything in a massive skip and sent it to landfill.

Don't get me wrong. I am very grateful. But all that crockery that they've tossed, someone would have loved it. Me, probably.

Hearing me?

Anyway, in the event that I didn't find anything, I went op shopping* beforehand. I will have to photograph a few more things, but here are two (albeit crummy photos) for tonight.

This crazy looking sugar bowl that Matt finds mildly disturbing.

And this pink creamer. That funny little vase in the background was another thing that the bin provided me in an earlier loot.

* Op shops = opportunity shops - charity shops - money you spend goes to the charity.


CurlyPops said...

Aaaaggghhh! I can't believe it was empty..what a let down. I also can't believe they were silly enough to pay for skip bins when a charity would have been glad to come and pick it up. Don't even get me started on smashing vintage china by chucking it in a bin! Obviously these people have never heard of reduce, re-use, recycle!

Georgie Love said...

I am the optimist - the skip bin? Means visits EVERY NIGHT until it goes. They aren't preparing an evening snack for you, they are preparing a SMORGASBOARD.

Taccolina said...

I'm so with you guys - it PAINS me to think of all that vintage china being smashed. Auugh.

Well done for not fainting away last night: we read with bated breath (which makes it sound all funny: I read your post out loud to Mr. Tacc)

After all that, HOW could the bin be empty?

Cindy said...

It is a bit like "be careful what you wish for". How long can one group of people pillage a house for? Why would you not want to save the money for skip bins and give it away. Bizarre - sad, any boys on there funny bikes at least?

nomes said...

bugger i was on the edge of my seat.....then fell off.dam!

Michelle said...

I can't believe anybody would throw out perfectly good sticks, let alone smash vintage china plates.

Must be something more to it than simple thoughtlessness. Perhaps there's some unhappy history between the late owner and the china chucker, and this is some form of catharsis.

jan said...

Thanks for the definition! Sorry the adreniline rush didn't have anything to show for it!

Lovely Lindsay said...

seriously! email me your address so i can get your pretty little treat for bidding on my nie nie auction mailed off to you!
love, lindsay

Cass said...

I hate that they are throwing all this stuff out, what a waste, don't they realise there are people out here that would BUY that stuff. I agree with Georgie Love a skip bin means a visit every night

flossy-p said...

eeep, having a man watch me would have freaked me out too! Still a thrilling post though. :)

Cathy {tinniegirl} said...

What are we all going to do for entertainment if the bin dries up or you get bored?

The Essess said...

I love these bin stories! I think because Im secretly jealous that I haven't been bin diving... I can't believe after all that you came home empty handed, how sad! I will have to wait to see what you find nextt!!

Megan.K. said...

Love your escapades! the guy in the driveway would have freaked me out too. Quick thinking with checking the boot with your torch. Now that you have been seen by a neighbour, will you have to wear more of a disguise next time?

Claire (ethel loves fred) said...

I have the milk jug and butter dish in that wild daisy design, I love it! Cheap and cheerfull, and if it disturbs the hubby? it's a bargain well worth having!