Oscars 2015: Cate Blanchett, Marion Cotillard, Sienna Miller, Julianne Moore's teeth, Rosamund Pike,

As everyone knows Cate Blanchett and I are BFFs and I pretty well hang out with Cate and Andrew like ALL THE TIME. So I know this is really simple, but Cate looks incredible in this column dress. That turquoise is just BOOM! Perfect. I really dig on this. High fives Cate. 

I called it very early (over on Facebook), but I do love Marion Cotillard's dress. Personality, style, and it just looks so banging good on her. And the flip side is cool too, unpredictable and just the way I like it. 

 I didn't even recognise Sienna Miller tonight. I was just clicking through and then reversed to find out who it was. And just in case you missed it: It's SIENNA MILLER.

Julianne Moore - one of my all-time favourites, and here practicing her cheesiest smile for the whole world. If I was her dentist I'd give her a gold star. Actually I'd give her an Allen's Snake, but let's not even go there because that's how I came to have so many fillings. 

The Ice Princess in roaring hot red with the sexiest split. Super beautiful, but I feel like she ran out the door and forgot: 
a) a pedicure
b) her handbag
c) jewellery
d) her smile
e) all of the above

Yeah. Nah. Looks like the designer had to lay a lot of bricks to make this dress. 

 Why does Adam Levine look like a cartoon character?

Margot Robbie, really simple, really beautiful, and I love that she's gone back to blonde. Game over. 

Oscars 2015: Alexis Carrington Colby AKA Gwyneth Paltrow, Lady Gaga, Scarlett Johansson, Jessica Chastain, Rita Ora, Eddie Redmayne

Gwynnie raided the 'Dynasty' wardrobe. I am totally in on the gag.

I love everything about this Gaga. I love everything. Except the red gloves that remind me of when I worked at McDonald's and had to don huge, oversized gloves for emptying the fry vat. Besides that. I love everything.

This might be better suited to someone attending the Tamworth Country Music Awards. And I can say that because I grew up in Tamworth. And I don't mean it as a compliment.

Apparently Jessica Chastain's bust is ready to party, while the rest of her body just wants to get back to business. 

I'm pretty sure Rita Ora stole the red carpet. And no one's going to be able to get it back. 

And then there was Eddie. I love Eddie. And I do love his inky blue tux. I know I said tuxedos bore me, but this one has piqued my interest. I'm into it Eddie! 

Oscars 2015:: Jennifer Aniston, Keira Knightley, Channing. Channing. Channing. Reese, J-Lo, Emma Stone

Traditionally, I am not a Jennifer Aniston fan. But I find myself really, really wanting to like this. But instead I feel like she has been to triage and been wrapped in a giant nude gauze bandage. Well at least it looks a little sparkly. AND PS GIRLFRIEND - how high up does that sheer section go?! YOWSERS!

Basically I am Keira Knightley's internet bodyguard - and if ANYONE says anything bad about her - I am going to throw a water bomb at you. Look at her. GODDESS! All salute, or curtsey, or do something to show your respect to this total mega-babe. 

WE INTERRUPT THIS BLOG POST TO BRING YOU: CHANNING TATUM. I want to Channing my Tatums. 

Right then. As you were.

Hell-oooooh Reese Witherspoon. Ain't no withering or dithering over this frock. Totally sublime, it doesn't matter if she's black or white, Reese nailed this old school glamour, and afterwards she can refashion it so she can work back as one of the waitstaff. 

No one told J-Lo this is not the Golden Globes. Ahem.

Yes Emma Stone. Yes. This is all flavours of brilliant. 

Golden Globes 2015: Kelly Osbourne, Katherine Heigl, Salma Hayek etc

Let's get straight into it because:

a) I have to go to bed at some stage

b) there's not much to say

From left to right, without further adieu, et voila, bon appetit - let's go shoppers!

Kelly Osbourne: lilac and indigo are pretty well heaven for me, so I love, love love this. 

Kate Cassidy: Angelina Jolie called. She wants her leg back.

Katherine Heigl: Form-fitting, inky blue and fabulous - I really love the chic simplicity of this. 

CZJ: Feels like Madame Tussaud's wax museum has been shipped in. Will the real CZJ please stand up? And maybe move around a little so we know you're real. 

Keira Knightley: Crumbs. Keira is one of my all-time favourites, but here in Chanel she looks like she just lost her little lamb.

Helen Mirren: Half the drama and glamour of the red carpet in one simple look - Helen Mirren nails the red carpet and shows everyone how it's done.

Melissa McCarthy: I love, love, love this classic black and white look - and that sheer pussy bow is pretty well magic for me. And she smiles. SHE SMILES PEOPLE! Loving. 

Maggie G: It's long documented how much I love Maggie G, but girlfriend - wear a flipping necklace, something over the top, camp and fabulous. It's the red carpet, you could even wear a necklace made out of al-foil. I don't care, just give me some eye candy.

Alison Williams: Did you know that she's also a CIA agent? She's showing how camouflage is done best. 

Jenna Dewan-Tatum: Apparently a pickpocket swept through the red carpet and stole everyone's sparkly jewellery. Because - where are the sparkles??

Salma Hayek: I say YES YOU CAN - because she did, and she is, and she was. This is all that. And then some. And a bit more.

Katie Holmes: Looks like someone couldn't wait to wear the Scientology curtains on the red carpet.