Not A Natural Born Runner

I know I've talked about it before, and dabbled in it for a while, but I got sick around eight weeks ago and stopped doing C25K. I was pretty annoyed at myself because I was into week four which is a fair investment on my behalf. 

So I got sick. Got really annoyed at myself for being sick. Started pinning exercise and motivation tips - but meanwhile I was stuck in bed. Bored out of my brains and frustrated. 

I waited 'til I got better - and then I rebooted my C25K.

I'm now into week six. It's been hard, and today was particularly hard. I struggled, I kept going, I talked myself in to keep going. I beat myself up, and then I talked myself off the ledge and told myself it was ok to be a little slower some days. I'm immensely tired, and it makes sense that that translates into my exercise. 

I'm not a natural born runner. I'm inherently pretty uncoordinated. 

Over the last six weeks I've had one part of me telling the other part of me - "This is too hard," "You've had a big day! You can stop now!" and "Why don't you go home instead, you can't do this." And then the other part of me saying: "Just do it, you're doing it, keep going." "You are doing AWESOME, you can do it - you're already halfway through." 

And so I break my runs into increments to make it feel more achievable. While those two voices duke it out in my head, my legs keep running. 

Sometimes it's hard. Other times I hit my stride. And each time when I finish my run - I am totally stoked that I did it. 

Sometimes I get panicky and think: I must stop this now. And then I sort out my breathing again, and get back into my rhythm and I keep going.

I may not be the most talented runner. Or the fastest. Or the best. But I am moving. I am pushing myself. 

Six weeks ago I couldn't do this. Six weeks ago I didn't have this stress relief. That relief of endorphins can conquer almost any bitch-ass email that comes my way.

I feel completely exhausted some days. And completely pumped other days. 

My body is a wonderland. But not in a Mayer way. It's done incredible things, and it's going to do even more incredible things. 

But this is not a go me post. This is a post to say - if I can do this, and if you've thought about exercising more, you can do it. Just start somewhere and you'll end up somewhere else feeling better for it. 

I'm not a natural born runner. I'm slow, my gait falters. But I just keep pushing.

Rebooting: C25K - Week One

So ages ago I started C25K. I got to the middle of week two (I think), and then stopped.

This was about the same time I fell off the apple cart. 

Today I rebooted, got out there and knocked off day one of week one. The first leg I wanted to cry and sit in the gutter. It was poorly timed on my behalf, as the first run started on a massive incline, setting the tone for the rest of the workout. 

Given so many people were running the City to Surf, I thought I should take to the streets and sneak in some exercise for myself. 

By the time I got home I was completely KOed. And now on the flipside I feel pretty good - not only physically, but mentally retuned and ready for the week ahead. 

And ready for day two and day three of C25K (the first day is the worst day, well that's my mantra anyway). 

I think I stopped exercising after holidays because work was busy, and life was busy, and I stopped prioritising myself and my time. Please don't get the world's smallest violin out, but when you're a mum, everyone else is above you in the food chain. It's called Burnt Chop Syndrome for a reason. 

I am back in the saddle friends!