Thursday, 15 July 2010

From The Front Line


On Sunday morning the Doctor came in to wake me up with great news. The ants were all over the kitchen. The Doctor can sometimes exaggerate, and I myself am prone to falling back to sleep. Which I did. It was way too early in the morning, and if I'd looked at a clock I would have realised it was illegal to be awake this early on a Sunday.

Later in the morning, when raiding the pantry for pancake supplies, I discovered that there were a lot of ants in our pantry and that the Doctor had not exaggerated that there were a lot. Of. Ants.

So I set to pulling out everything from the pantry. And then the tupperware cupboard. And then the doll's house. It was incredibly fun. If insect extermination is your thing.

Later in the afternoon we discovered the ants in a sealed jars. Those crazy pranksters, they get into everything. The jar was half full, and as any budget-abiding housewife could agree, those ants were not getting the caster sugar. No way Jose.

I set the jar on the bench and intermittently pulled ants from said jar. It took quite a long time, because they start stinking after a while (hey guys, we're under threat, let's stink out this jar of sugar!), so I left them for a while. Finally in the afternoon I managed to get them all out.

Well. That's what I thought. Tonight I went to make Donna Hay's polka dot cookies (because they are so darn good), and I pulled out the caster sugar, carefully measuring it out. Dark spotted caster sugar. And then I discovered some of those smarmy ants had bunkered down.

Let's call this an awesome Masterchef inspired invention. Sugar WITH protein.

Now if you come around to my house and I offer you something I've baked, you will be safe in the knowledge that any sugar it may include, also contains ant proteins. That my friends is called an Invention Test.

9 comments:

trash said...

I foresee a bidding war between Delia and Donna Hay.

little greenapple farm said...

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mama bear said...

I HATE the ants. We have the ants. And more recently, the flies. (We think from a dead possum in the roof. GROSS).

Michelle said...

Little tricksters!

LionessLady said...

You should lay some antrid for them, let them at it and after a few days they are all gone! Worked for us and our pantry anyway! And throw out your caster sugar!!!

Cath W said...

I have an a*t phobia. I cannot even type the word a*t. I do not like the word cannot because if you glance at it quickly it looks like it contains the word a*t. You have freaked me out so completely and on so many freakin' levels, I may need to forward you my therapy bills.

Cath @ chunkychooky said...

A bit of roughage in the diet never goes astray.

Kate Moore said...

It didn't change the taste?
Ants in my sugar makes it taste funny. Damn ants. Better than cockroaches. I've served up tea to a friend only to have a cockroach float to the top of the cup.
It was a cup pulled from the back of the cupboard. I'm not that unclean, OK?

Marian Hazel said...

oh PMM I share your pain- we once lived in a place totally infested with pesky little ants. Everything had to be kept in the fridge- including sugar. That was the only place that it was safe. The little buggers even hid on the underside of lids waiting for you to open and then scurry in. I hate them. Fingers crossed you find a solution!