Breastfeeding

One of my co-habiters Nat drew my attention to the fact that it is World Breastfeeding Week. She's written a great post over here about making super excellent breastmilk.

And given I am a devout breastfeeder, here's my post to join in the celebrations.

I began my breastfeeding career in May 2005. It was a rude shock to me that it did not come naturally. The nurses grabbed my *modest* bosoms and shoved them unceremoniously towards the Doctor. It wasn't happening and it was frustrating and every time I needed to feed the Doctor, my sweet little newborn, I had to be 'monitored'. Like I was on probation. Like I need a Lindsay Lohan style ankle bracelet thing to monitor my progress. They then decided I should try a nipple shield.

My oh my, if you've never had to use a nipple shield, consider yourself lucky. The luckiest person in lucky town.

Using a nipple shield was, to me, so unnatural and repulsive, but I did it to feed my baby and get these toe rags out of my sight! I also requested to see the lactation consultant before I was released from hospital. The response was, no, you can go home and come back and see her.

Not a great solution for me. So we sought a private lactation consultant - Leila Chirgwin. Leila was exactly what I needed. She was gentle, nurturing, reassuring. And she helped me better than all of those nurses combined shoving my boob into the Doctor's mouth. Leila helped us wean the Doctor off the nipple shields, and had us feeding well within a few days. With nipple shields I felt like a fembot. Without nipple shields I felt like a totally rad mama.

I got mastitis ten days after giving birth to the Doctor. I vividly remember lying in bed feeling very grey, wanting to die. I felt cranky and digusting. I couldn't lie on the sore side. I felt sick as a dog. My breast felt as though it was on fire. I went to a GP and he told me that I was 'young and just had the flu' and that I'd get over it. Despite the fact I had shown him the very red, very cranky segment of sore breast.

Coincidentally I had an appointment with the Early Childhood Nurse that afternoon and she sent me off pronto to get an appointment with any GP because I had mastitis and if I didn't go on antibiotics straight away I might wind up in hospital. So off I went with my Mum and the Doctor to visit.. the only doctor I could get into. A geriatric doctor. He promptly conduced that I needed antibiotics and we went home. Within hours of taking them I felt infinitely better.

Throughout breastfeeding I had many bouts of mastitis, but for the most part, I managed to nip them in the bud before they spiralled out of control via massage and ultrasound, and continuing to feed feed feed off the sore side. New mums go through so much, and are on such a steep learning curve, mastitis is like a double dose of rude shock.

We persevered and The Doctor and I continued breastfeeding successfully until he was 19 months. We loved it.

When Tiny came along, I knew not to expect anything to be easy, but that little sucker came out sucking, and thankfully breastfeeding was a dreamy ride with her, and rarely a bout of mastitis. We breastfeed for 22 months.

Now Tiny likes to pretend to breastfeed her dollies, and talks about 'nilckles' - which to her is milkies.

The Australian Breastfeeding Association is a fantastic organisation with loads of support on tap (pun not intended). If you ever need any help or tips or tricks with breastfeeding call their hotline, they are amazing.

1800 mum 2 mum

1800 686 2 686

I've featured this clip before on my blog, but I love it so much - especially those stretchy, stretchy nipples - it's up again. I love it.

* Please note:: I'm not critical of anyone that can't breastfeed - this isn't meant to be an anti-formula, Gisele Bundchen type rant. I just loved breastfeeding. I really struggled with it, I sought help, and it took a long time for it to click. I had a lot of grey days when it just didn't work for me. It wasn't just boom - the Lactation Consultant remedied everything, it took weeks, maybe months to master it.

* I realise nipple shields help lots of people - but for me, it wasn't a solution to my problem. I felt it was the easy way for the nurses at the hospital to get me out of their way for someone else to come in, without giving me the option to visit the lactation consultant. They have their place, but I also wasn't shown how to use them properly, so in the wee hours, when I was trying to get a nipple shield to stick and my newborn was crying, it would have been more helpful to a) show me how to use them properly so they don't keep coming off and b) let me see the damn lactation consultant instead of having to go home and come back later. At the end of the day, we're all trying to feed our babies, right?!

The Village People

There's an old African proverb that says 'it takes a village to raise a child'. Hillary Clinton might on occasion get the credit for it, but it's older than that bird.

I've been thinking hard about this saying. But in a general sense - not just for myself, but in this day and age where it's more like com-mutiny than community. I'm not feeling particularly morose, I just wondered, what DOES ONE do when you have no one?

What happens if you don't have actually have a 'village' to help you raise your child?

Or, what if your village doesn't want to help you raise your child? What if your village is too busy with their own life to help? What if helping you raise your children is just not your village people's thing?

Then what?

I remember in the early days, after the birth of the Doctor, the nurses, midwives, Early Childhood nurses all implored how important it is to let people help. But what happens when no one offers to help? Or there's no one to ask/beg for help?

We struggled in the early days, particularly after the birth of the Doctor. I had mastitis just 10 days after giving birth. I wasn't sleeping well. It was a steep learning curve. Whenever I'd hear a peep from my wee babe I would scuttle over. I was a wreck. Couple that with not feeling confident (I remember my first thoughts when carrying the Doctor through the front door for the first time were 'Oh my goodness, we are responsible for this wee darling baby's survival'.)

I didn't have a Mother's Group because I dropped out after just a couple of weeks. Attending was angsty and tedious (not to say I felt confident by myself, but it was all about competing, who knew the most, and the fact that I never really clicked with anyone. I just dreaded it).

To be completely honest, I didn't want to leave the Doctor when I first had him. I hated leaving him. I wanted to be with him. But if I had a village to help me raise my children - then life would have been a whole lot peachier. But I didn't even know my neighbours. And society has evolved in that way so I can pass through weeks, months, years without even saying as much as 'hello' to them.

I often think about my friends who are single parents. I wonder how do they cope when they are exhausted. When they are so fatigued they're snappy and can't swap with someone for a quick cat nap? Parenting is a big enough gig that is sometimes difficult even for two people, let alone winging it solo. This weekend has certainly confirmed that for me. I'm still bone achingly tired and so darn cross. I can't shake it.

So tell me - how do you gather 'round ye olde village people when you need to raise some helpers?

Hooters And The Blowfish

This has been one of those weeks where I start to question things (you may be questioning why Pammy is on my blog?! Slow down dear reader, I'll get to it).

My son started off two weeks ago with gastro, which then went into croup, which then morphed into an ear infection. My babe has had bronchiolitis during this time too. It has been a pretty prickly time, and last week when I said I needed sleep, well now I've gone into over-time and don't want to sleep because I just can't.. You hearing me?

Anyway, this takes me to a couple of days ago when I was attempting to feed my babe. She's 8 months old. Cute as a button. Well of course I think that. Anyway, she fed at 11:30pm, so I trot in for her morning feed and she just growls at me. Arcs her back. Oooh man. Frustration Grand Central. I kept re-offering her the boobie, but do you think she'd take it. Uh uh. Not until 11:30am would she give in to my offers, and then only took one side.

So I felt like a lop-sided Pammy Anderson. In pain. In fear of mastitis. It made me think of this woman. Although I don't own a pink bikini. Or a navel ring. Oh and one small thing, my hooties are NOT 36MMM. But you know, I still felt like I should have got an application from Hooters.

Anyway, I needed some advice. My baby was bucking off the boobie like a wild bronco.

I contacted the Australian Breastfeeding Association. Man, are they gold, or are they gold? Dutifully, I took down the numbers to call for a little back-up. But then I discovered you can also email them (if it's not urgent) and someone will contact you within 48 hours. How's that for a brilliant resource? I sent off all my stats, a long, laborious email and not even five hours later, I got an email response from my new friend at the ABA.

And you know what? Her response made me laugh so hard - it was the best fix-it of all.

In my email I had asked about feeding off to sleep and how I was a little worried about this habit that seemed to be forming. Her response:

'There is really no evidence that it is bad to feed bubs to sleep. Tell me any man who doesn't like to go to sleep cuddled up to a warm pair of breasts ( exclude any gay friends!). Or anyone who doesn't like a cuddle when they are feeling tired or sad.. it's a normal human response really. And so long as it is working for you, there's really no need to change it.'

I love that. Thanks Marae - you're a Genius with a capital G!

And finally, my babe fed properly. I was no longer a lop-sided Pammy, with dreams to run along the beach in a high cut red swimsuit. Phew. Thank goodness for that.

PS - The new Small Magazine is out.. Could it be any sweeter? No, no I don't think it could. Beautiful. And there's a piece on Alicia Paulson of Posie fame.. Hello? Fantastic!