
Teenagers! Gather 'round! I've got something to share with you.
I don't need to see your butt cheeks hanging out the bottom of denim cut-offs.
I don't!
I have my own ample derriere to swing around in all manner of clothing, though I tend to cover mine up. But just in case I do feel the urge, I can take a look at my derriere in a g-string, or a boy-leg brief, or even - gasp! - newd!
When I see you walking down the road with half your booty hanging out the back, I feel sad! Buy a size up! If you don't it can also result in camel-toe-itis! Just because clothes are a larger size doesn't mean they cost more - treat yourself. You can thank me later!
Call me prudish, call me PottyMouthMama, whatever you want to call me is ok by me, I just don't want to see the junk in yer trunk.
You might think I'm old, and yes, I am a parent, but I'm not old at 31. Trust me, I remember being a teenager - and I had no urge to hang my butt out for the world to share. In fact I was infatuated with over-sized tees bearing Malcolm X, Arrested Development quotes and Keppers to hide my lanky frame. Gulp.
Let Jessica Simpson set the example here. She bought a size up and her cheeks aren't on the menu. BUY A SIZE UP! I don't want to see the boo in your booty.
And the image above? Front bottom? Junk in her kerplunk? Whatever that look is, she's headed straight to Wrongtown.