I'm going to have to go there - and call a treaty on fake tan. Kylie Gillies - whoever is doing this to you - report them to the authorities. You don't look like you've just come back from the Bahamas, you look like you've stepped off the rotisserie at Charcoal Charlie's. I know it hurts, but loofahing it off will probably hurt even more.
I'm not even going to mention that Dancing with the Stars wardrobe called - they want their dress back.
PS - If you're thinking about auditioning for Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, I hear there's an opening in the Oompa Loompa line up. You won't be in make-up too long, except for the eyebrows and hair. They'll stump you there.
image of Kylie Gillies via The Australian
Willy Wonka image via Hark